Life without Christ

Have you ever thought you are ok just by hearing about God? 

Yes you know about God but you never experienced him personally.

Well that was me almost 4 years ago. I thought I was fine because I read my bible. I prayed at times. I also knew there are certain things right in Gods eyes and certain things that are sins. 

Well I did not worry to much when I went out partying because I always came back the next week and repent. It went all like this all the time. 

I kept journals of these repentance conversations.  I thought I was good. You know you are doing things that you are not suppose to do. There are always that voice inside of you that tells you to stop, go this way or that way. 

I thought I could live a double life. Be someone at home with my parents and family and totally a diffrent person when I am with colleagues and friends. When I look back at the past I can really see now where I went wrong and where I tried to make God happy in my own strenght.

I tried a life without Christ. I had no personal relationship with him because I thought that I first have to finish with certain sins. I thought I am not ready yet to become a boring person that does not drink or that goes to clubs. I wanted to be part of the group and enjoy life. 

How blind can one be. I mean God does not want perfection  because no one is. Only Him God is perfect. My life looked great from the outside. Money was good. I could support my parents and my son . Everything was hunky dory but there was something missing. I had bad relationships with friends I called boyfriends that time. Every relationship just did not worked out.

I realise now I was looking for something only God could fill. Past failures are there to build us to become better then we were. It is a lesson and not a life sentence. We dont have to stay in the situations that we dont like, that does not fulfill us. 

I learned that the One who made me should be placed first  in my life. God knew me better than anyone and all I was looking for is found in Him. 

He is a father, friend, lover, companion and I just had to surrender to Him. God broke me graciously so I could be made whole again. He filled me up with His love, His kindness and His mercy.  If it had not been for God who took me back into His family I would not have been able to write this right now. 

I am so thankful to God that I could get the chance to fix my relationship with Him . To walk with Him and know that there are no sins between us that can keep me from talking to Him.

Yes I am not perfect and I do still sin but now I am not condemn anymore but convicted. The Holy Spirit let me do things that are acceptable to God. We should come as we are to God and not wait for when we think we are perfect.  God wants the glory for making you whole again.

Life without Christ is a  waste of your precious time. Things dont work out because you have the wrong priorities.  You have idols and do not worship God with your mind, heart, all your strenght and your soul. 

Give everything to God and let Him start to fix you and mould you and shape you. Its a beautiful journey. Fix your eyes on Jesus everytime you want to be reminded of your past. 

Its a wonderful journey with God. Yes it is not easy but surely worth it. I am no longer  a slave but I am a child of God. 

I have victory !!Im redeemed and I am free!!. 

Thank You Jesus Christ the son of God our Father. Thank for the Holy Spirit who lives within me and comfort me in everything I do. 

CWR